Gloria says this was me this morning, before 6:30...
And what she doesn't know is that it only got worse from there...
Let's recap the two hours between five and seven o'clock in the morning.
5:00--The alarm clock goes off. (That's enough to make anyone grumpy though, so that doesn't count.) But I was feeling pretty lousy after a night of coughing and was beginning to lose my voice.
5:10--I realize we are going to school in spite of the slick layer of ice on my car and the roads in my neighborhood.
5:20--Gloria gets up. The tooth fairy brought five quarter last night. Normally that's a good thing. Not this morning...she was too focused on that to brush her teeth, get dressed, make her bed, brush her hair, or generally do anything she is *supposed* to do every morning.
5:50--I am dressed and ready to head downstairs to fix breakfast and pack lunch boxes. Gloria still wasn't dressed. (Her teeth were brushed, but that was it.)
5:55--Still not dressed, despite my warning of going to school in her nightgown, Gloria has a nosebleed. And even better, she tries to make it stop by BLOWING it! Has that EVER worked??? N-O-P-E. And still didn't work today. Just put me even closer to the edge.
6:00--I throw my hands up in frustration and inform Gloria that I am LEAVING at 6:10, regardless of how she is dressed, fed, or otherwise ready for school. Also told her she was going to have to fix her own breakfast if she wanted me to pack her lunch.
6:01-6:09--Throw food in lunch boxes. Scoop the cat box. Find my watch and earrings. Go out and start the car, hoping to defrost the ice before it was time to go. Gloria, in the meantime, has stomped downstairs and begrudgingly poured herself a box of Christmas Captain Crunch. (Breakfast of champions, right???) Spilled some milk and cereal on the counter, which she didn't clean up (and it's still not cleaned up). And the back of her head has the biggest rat's nest in it you have ever seen! But I refused to help with any of it. It was time to go.
6:10--We head out the door, Gloria with hairbrush in hand. I promptly slip on the ice while putting my stuff in the car and again while tossing the garbage in the dumpster on my way out of the neighborhood. Remind me why we're going to school and not on a delay???
6:30--Drop Gloria at before school care, only to discover that they will be CLOSED on January 3rd, never mind the fact that many of us have to work that day. But "corporate in Texas sets the calendar." So I'm fuming even more as I slip-slide my way back to the car.
6:37--My car slip-slides its way down the entrance ramp to the interstate loop that I drive to work every day. ICE. Remind me again why I am driving to work in the dark, freezing rain, on icy roads? Oh yeah, because school was opening on the regular schedule. (Even though ALL the surrounding counties were delayed or closed.)
6:38-6:48--Driving slower than usual, I discovered a few more icy patches on the "treated" interstate. Also passed not one, not two, but three accidents.
6:48--There was some
really smart, super intelligent *ahem* I think "stupid" is a better choice (and I just got fussed at for using "stupid") person driving 30, yes THIRTY, miles per hour in the MIDDLE lane on the interstate. I suppose the fact that this wonderful person had his hazard lights on made it ok.
6:57--Arrived at school, only to slip in the parking lot. And discover that grabbing your icy car for support doesn't work particularly well.
6:59--Ask the wonderful school counselor who has duty downstairs to please inform my students, if she sees them before they head upstairs to our classroom, that their normally cheerful, happy teacher is in a really, really, really bad mood. I think I looked something like this...
I did eventually find a better mood and things were fine at school today. Don't worry. We all survived!