Thanks for stopping by! We were a family of three, until we added one more (cat, that is), making us a family of four. In 2012, we added four husband, two girls, and a dog. We have a full plate as a party of eight!

Adoption, blended families, pets, school,'s all here. Pull up a chair and read a while. After you do, please leave a little comment love! It makes me happy...and y'all know...if Momma is happy, then everyone is least at our house!

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Two Questions

One was asked of me.

The other I am asking you.

First, the one that was asked of me...

"Momma?  Do you think the cats were playing with my pumpkin?  It's got hair in it."

Ummm...I doubt the cats were playing with the pumpkin.  Instead, I believe that would be a sign that the pumpkin needs to be disposed of.

And now...Momma's not happy.  Can you tell?  (Oops...that's not my question for you!)

Some of you read about the bullying on the playground several weeks ago.  In some ways, things have improved.  But there are still some inappropriate words and actions going on and Gloria is very discouraged by all of it.  I discussed it with her teacher at conference time last week.  Thursday night, Gloria informed me that she had been talking with her teacher during recess and that she (the teacher) had helped her (Gloria) figure something out.  Naturally I asked what that was.

Are you ready for this?  Hold on to your socks, because I know I thought mine had been knocked off on Thursday night.

The other girls are bullying me because I'm too soft and I need to harden up.

I maintained my composure in front of my eight year old, but I really wanted to blow a gasket over this one.  So my question to you would you handle this?  I'm so at a loss here.

And after you offer your advice, you can go visit some happier Sunday snapshots by clicking below.  :)

Sunday Snapshot


Eva said...

Poor pumpkin!

Merill, I wish I had advice on the bullying, but I have no experience on this issue with my kidlets. I'm so sorry. I think my socks would've been knocked off, too. Insane. And what has the teacher suggested to the perpetrator? Sheesh. Just awful.

anything but LoKEY said...

Are you KIDDING ME??!! That is ridiculous! My mother was a teacher for 20-something years and now both her and my father are headmasters of a Christian school. If I were you, I would be talking to the school board and the principal. Bullying can only be stopped if the teachers and the other school staff will GET INVOLVED. Teachers are aware when kids act this way, whether they say so or not. They know what is being said. They have to be willing to get in there and put a stop to it. NOT hand out bad advice.

I don't know if you are familiar with this, but if you have ever heard Frank Peretti's testimony he talks about this. It is really touching but it opens your eyes to the fact that someone has to step up in these situations and do what is right. You might want to look into it. The version I had was cassette and I think Focus on the Family may have done it.

Anyway, that is all I got. Praying for Gloria and you! <3

Chris said...

Poor baby.

She does need to stand up for herself. The bully needs to know that your daughter is not affected by it. At least your daughter needs to convey this in front of the bully. To you, she can pour out her heart. Maybe practice possible scenarios with her at home, give her the vocabulary she needs to be strong and confident....the bully needs to know that he/she has not power over your daughter.

Please keep us updated. I will keep you both in my prayers.

Betsy said...

Thanks for commenting on my blog. I'm so sorry about your daughter's bullying problem. She is a child and shouldn't have to feel that she needs to protect herself. She needs to know she can depend on adults in her life to make her feel safe. I know we would have that issue if some of my kids were in school. I feel very blessed that I am able to home school. I now that isn't an option for everyone, though.
If my child were being bullied, I would make a pest of myself at that school, until my child felt safe. Children can't concentrate on learning if they don't feel safe. And the bully undoubtedly has some issues that he/she is dealing with that are probably interfering with their learning. The school needs to deal with this because their job is to teach both children. Some times schools need to be reminded of what they are there for!

Martha said...

I think I would blow a gasket too. There's a neat little story that a new york teacher used as a lesson about bullying that is being passed around on facebook...I'll try to send it to you somehow through email. You may have seen it...but I think a principal needs to be told about this statement she is making to your daughter...that kind of attitude is's like the teacher doesn't want to deal with the problem so she passes on the responsibility to the victim. UGH

Martha said...

I copied the thing from facebook about bullying...

Imagine a photo of a crumpled sheet of paper here:

Paula - A teacher in New York was teaching her class about bullying and gave them the following exercise to perform. She had the children take a piece of paper and told them to crumple it up, stamp on it and really mess it up but do not rip it. Then she had them unfold the paper, smooth it out and look at how scarred and dirty is was. She then told them to tell it they’re sorry. Now even though they said they were sorry and tried to fix the paper, she pointed out all the scars they left behind. And that those scars will never go away no matter how hard they tried to fix it. That is what happens when a child bullys another child, they may say they’re sorry but the scars are there forever. The looks on the faces of the children in the classroom told her the message hit home. Stop Bullying

Rebecca said...

There is nothing wrong with being soft and there is nothing wrong with your daughter. What is wrong is society thinking that an EIGHT year old needs to harden up. NO no no no!!

She needs to keep right on being her sweet self. Keep her tender heart. She could be the next Mother Theresa.

Amelia said...

I just read your post about the teacher's insight for Gloria regarding her bullies. I can SOOOOO... relate to this. I was told when my daughter was in preschool and being bullied-- that it was my fault-- that I needed to "toughen" her up. I too was told that she was too soft and needed hardening. I have worked in education for over 20 years-- and this viewpoint is totally unacceptable!! We spend years trying to teach our children to be respectful and caring and compassionate-- only to be told that they shouldn't be-- because it makes them victims. GRRR!!!! I too agree that we need focus on softening the others-- and teaching them to be more compassionate-- not the other way around. Imagine how lovely this world would be with more sensitivity and compassion-- and softness. <33333